Adult Friendships: how to make and maintain!

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Adult friendships aren’t as straightforward and easy to make as we wish them to be.

Truth is, as adults, we need to have the intention and put in the effort to make and maintain these friendships.

As children, making friends was easier because we spent more time together in school, neighborhoods, or even within our families (we call this in psychology the proximity effect).

Not only that, but these encounters made us experience and share vulnerability as we unintentionally went through many difficult and meaningful moments together

(Remember the stress before exams or the joy of being on the same football team?).

These factors are essential for building the foundations of friendships - meaningful and deep connections.

Did you know that adults who believe friendships don’t need effort reported feeling lonelier after 5 years compared to those who understand the effort required?

So,

  • Show up to the volunteering groups.
  • Make time to have coffee with your friends.
  • Say yes to the reunion lunch they are planning.
  • Reach out and send a quick text or call to check in; it can make a big difference.
  • Plan an activity with them; whether it’s a movie night, a hike, or a simple walk at the park.
  • When you’re with friends, put away your phone and be fully engaged in the conversation.
  • Send them that birthday message, celebrate their anniversaries, and acknowledge their achievements!

Take home message:

If you find it hard to nurture adult friendships, you are not alone.

There are effective ways to build and maintain these connections and prioritize your social well-being.

It's never too late to reconnect with an old friend or reach out to someone new. Your next meaningful connection could be just one conversation away

What do you think holds you back from taking the first step in building or maintaining adult friendships?



Yours truly,

Dana Berri

Kindness is not just a virtue, it's a way of life.


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