KindMindbyDana

 Seeking validation from partners who are consistently absent or abusive could be a trauma response.  Growing up with consistently absent, uninvolved or abusive parents, especially during the crucial period when our core beliefs and self-perception take shape, often leads us to internalize beliefs of being unworthy or unlovable. Today, many find themselves caught in a cycle, craving closeness and love from individuals who mirror the traits of their caregivers—disinterested, absorbed in their own thoughts, work, or other people (Freud had a point!). This the mind’s attempt to recreate a relationship where we can, perhaps for the first time, experience the love and care we have always craved since childhood. In doing so, we try to prove to ourselves that we are indeed lovable and enough! This time, the hope is that they won't leave. They will show they care, bringing love to the child within us. However, they most probably may repeat the pattern, leaving us in misery once again!...

We often hear people say that ‘life is short’ , and we agree…  Don't we? Have you ever wondered how to improve or cultivate your presence in the moment? How to optimize your interactions with others, embrace new experiences, and navigate conflicts in a meaningful way? There are many simple yet impactful strategies and reflective questions that foster self-awareness, allowing us to stay grounded in any direct experience. Rather than ruminating on these aspects or experiencing fleeting happiness without a sense of connection, leading us to complain later that, ‘ time flies’ , and ‘ I can't believe the day is over!’. 1. This can be by simply paying attention to your body sensations, allowing you to be present in the moment, through: ✨ Body scan: Take a few moments to scan your body from head to toe. Notice any areas of tension, discomfort, or relaxation. Be aware of each part, bringing your attention to the sensations in different regions. ✨ Breath awareness: Explore your breat...

I'm frequently asked, 'What does it mean to be a trauma-informed therapist?'  So,  I've dedicated this blog to provide a brief explanation of both trauma and trauma-informed therapy. 1. What is Trauma? Trauma is complex, impacting people in unique ways. The DSM-5 defines it as exposure to shocking, distressing, or harmful events that often exceed the individual's ability to cope, leading to a profound and lasting impact on their emotional well-being. These events can include death, abuse, natural disasters, serious injury, or sexual violations… Traumatic events can also comprise a tough breakup, a car accident or a developmental exposure to abuse and neglect as a child. According to the DSM-5, individuals may experience: ✨ Flashbacks: Re-experiencing the traumatic event as if it's happening again. ✨ Dissociation: Feeling disconnected from oneself or surroundings. ✨ Alterations in Mood and Cognition: Shifts in emotions, beliefs, or thought patterns. ✨ Sleep Probl...

How to slow down your racing thoughts? First, ask yourself 'what else is there?' Direct your attention beyond your physical self and immerse it into the world around you. Take a moment to observe your surroundings. Where are you sitting? Can you feel the texture of the shirt you're wearing? As you expand your awareness to the world around you, remain attuned to the sensations within your body. Notice your heartbeats, the subtle movements, and the rhythm of your breath. In the midst of these sensations, pay attention to any emerging images.  These might be memories or recurring scenes playing in your mind. Now, with your focus on these sensations and images, listen to your body's cues. What is your body telling you to do right now? Is there a prompting to take a step, stretch your neck, raise your hands or take a comforting posture? Now, observe any emotions surfacing. It could be joy, worry, hope, or a sense of calmness. Take home message:   ✨In the midst of overthinkin...